HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_015398.jpg
1.15 MB
Extraction Summary
6
People
0
Organizations
2
Locations
2
Events
2
Relationships
3
Quotes
Document Information
Type:
Script / evidence item
File Size:
1.15 MB
Summary
This document appears to be a page from a script titled 'The Missing Episode of Seinfeld,' bearing the Bates stamp HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_015398. It contains two scenes: a stand-up monologue by Jerry Seinfeld regarding the divine origin of erections, and a dinner scene involving George Costanza and his parents where George's father reveals he is taking Viagra to improve his sex life. While the content is a comedy script, its inclusion in the House Oversight files indicates it was seized as evidence, reportedly found in Jeffrey Epstein's safe.
People (6)
| Name | Role | Context |
|---|---|---|
| Jerry Seinfeld | Character / Comedian |
Performing a monologue onstage about erections and prayer.
|
| George Costanza | Character |
Having dinner with his parents, asking why his father is laughing.
|
| George's Father | Character |
Admitting to taking Viagra.
|
| George's Mother | Character |
Telling the father not to reveal their secret.
|
| Adam | Biblical Figure |
Mentioned in Jerry's joke regarding the first erection.
|
| Eve | Biblical Figure |
Mentioned in Jerry's joke.
|
Timeline (2 events)
Jerry Seinfeld performing a stand-up routine about divine intervention in male arousal.
Comedy Club
Dinner conversation where George's father reveals he is taking Viagra.
Parents' residence
Locations (2)
| Location | Context |
|---|---|
|
Setting for Jerry's scene.
|
|
|
Setting for the dinner scene.
|
Relationships (2)
Explicitly labeled as 'George's father' in script.
Explicitly labeled as 'George's mother' in script.
Key Quotes (3)
"Did God look down at Adam and Eve one day and say, “Oops, I forgot something. Let there be erections.”"Source
HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_015398.jpg
Quote #1
"“Please, God, I’ ll be sensitive to her needs, I promise, oh God, please, just make it hard . . .”"Source
HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_015398.jpg
Quote #2
"I’ ve been taking Viagra, George, and it really works. Your mother and I have been making whoopee like it was going out of style."Source
HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_015398.jpg
Quote #3
Full Extracted Text
Complete text extracted from the document (1,202 characters)
The Missing Episode of Seinfeld
[Jerry Seinfeld is onstage at a comedy club.]
Jerry: Did God look down at Adam and Eve one day and say, “Oops,
I forgot something. Let there be erections.” So Adam got the first hard-
on in history. But God forgot to say when. And that’ s why men don’ t
always get an erection when they want one. Women don’ t know it, but
sometimes men have to actually pray for a hard-on. “Please, God, I’ ll be
sensitive to her needs, I promise, oh God, please, just make it hard . . .”
I forgot something. Let there be erections.” So Adam got the first hard-
on in history. But God forgot to say when. And that’ s why men don’ t
always get an erection when they want one. Women don’ t know it, but
sometimes men have to actually pray for a hard-on. “Please, God, I’ ll be
sensitive to her needs, I promise, oh God, please, just make it hard . . .”
[Cut to George Costanza, having dinner with his parents. There is no
conversation, but George’ s father is smiling, then chortles out loud.]
conversation, but George’ s father is smiling, then chortles out loud.]
George: What! What! What’ s so funny? Is it because I’ m
becoming more like you every day?
becoming more like you every day?
George’ s father: Should I tell ’ im? I’ m gonna tell ’ im.
George’ s mother: No, don’ t tell ’ im. It’ s private between you
and me. It’ s none of his beeswax.
and me. It’ s none of his beeswax.
George: C’ mon, stop teasing me, I wanna know, whatever it is, I
wanna know, so c’ mon, tell me.
wanna know, so c’ mon, tell me.
George’ s father: Okay, I’ m gonna tell ’ im. I’ ve been taking
Viagra, George, and it really works. Your mother and I have been making
whoopee like it was going out of style.
Viagra, George, and it really works. Your mother and I have been making
whoopee like it was going out of style.
HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_015398
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